Buddhism Final Reflection 2020

11/17/2020
Joshua Berg - ML M361: Final Paper
Reverend Arvid Straube

I’ve been drawn to Buddhism since I first encountered it in undergraduate school. I was truly hooked when I read Matthieu Ricard’s book, Happiness: A Guide to Developing Life’s Most Important Skill. It was a transformative moment for me, which served not only to give me a deeper respect for Buddhism, but also lead me out of a bout of serious depression. Although my affinity for, and desire to learn about Buddhism is great, I have not done formal study beyond reading a book here and there and attending infrequent Dharma talks. Some of the dharma talks included a semi-regular sitting with my family at a Los Angeles Buddhist center as well as a sitting with the well-respected teacher Kusala Bhikshu. A consistent meditation practice is also something I have desired for years but still remains suspended in the planning stages.

In taking this class, I hoped to fill in the lacunas in my knowledge of Buddhism by delving deeper into the specifics of Buddhist history and practice, and to finally kickstart a regular mediation practice. I believe I have achieved the former to a significant degree. Time will tell whether the latter takes hold.

The class has “enlightened” me (pun intended) in numerous ways. First, I came to understand and love the fact that Buddhist concepts can be encapsulated while, at the same time, are uncontainable. What I mean by that is, a single sentence can convey something so specific about Buddhism but, to achieve an understanding of the true meaning of that sentence, one must search a lifetime. To illustrate this further, here are some examples.

“Emptiness is not less; it is just bound less.” This paints a clear picture and is also incredibly thought provoking – something to contemplate endlessly. In class, James Ishmael Ford provided some more great examples. “Enlightenment doesn’t mean your shit stops stinking.” This sentence conveys meaning very effectively in its straightforwardness and crudity. Once again, however, its true meaning is much deeper and more nuanced.

I hold a Bachelor of Arts degree in Japanese language and literature, so I also appreciated Rev. Ford sharing with us the saying “Kyou no satori wa ashita no machigai,” which translates to “today’s enlightenment is tomorrow’s mistake.” The great thing about this saying is that it works as well in the reverse; “Kyou no machigai wa ashita no satori,” meaning “today’s mistake is tomorrow’s enlightenment.” There is a similar relatively well-known Japanese saying that encompasses both versions. “Ashita wa ashita no kaze ga fuku,” literally meaning “the winds of tomorrow will blow tomorrow,” or, more plainly said, tomorrow is another day. It’s simple on the surface, yet quite profound.

Finally, the sentence “don’t believe everything you think” or alternatively, “don’t believe anything you think,” struck me as very meaningful. It is an easily digestible entrée into the complex idea of non-self. All of these sayings, as heuristic devices, are great introductions to larger Buddhist concepts. They help ease novices into Buddhism in a way that feels approachable and they refocus more advanced students like me who are still searching or may have lost their way.

Another enlightenment I had in this class had to do with lists. I have always been challenged by the numerous Buddhist lists. There are the four noble truths: the truth of suffering, the truth of the cause of suffering, the truth of the end of suffering, and the truth of the path that leads to the end of suffering. There is the eight-fold path of belief, resolve, speech, action, livelihood, effort, thought, and meditation. The three jewels are the Buddha, the Dharma, and the Sanga. The five precepts are don’t kill, don’t steal, don’t lie or speak unkindly, don’t commit sexual immorality, and don’t take intoxicants. The reason I am challenged by these lists is because I prefer thinking about single broad concepts one at a time so, memorizing and internalizing these lists has somewhat eluded me.

I have not given up mastering the above listed lists but, in this class, I was excited to encounter a few more lists that resonated with me in a significant enough way to easily remember. First of all, Buddhism adds onto the five senses we are already familiar with, by including thinking as a sixth. Although not a sense in the traditional sense, labeling it as such really helped me to further my understanding of the Buddhist idea of non-self by detaching what I think of as control from thought.

Another list I found very familiar was the list of the four divine emotions, or heavenly abodes as they are also known. These are states of mind that I have already been actively working to cultivate. The first is Metta (Loving-kindness), which is wishing well to every being. The second is Karuna (Compassion), or the ability to hold yours or others suffering. The third is Mudita (Joy with others), rejoicing in other people’s good fortune. The fourth is Upekkha (Equanimity). Equanimity is a new concept introduced to me in this course and I am still grappling with its meaning. My rudimentary interpretation of equanimity is a state of being in empathetic connection to all life and the universe. The four divine emotions also have “far enemies” and “near enemies.” Although that is more to remember, I feel that grasping the essence of these four positive states puts one in a mind to understand what their opposites are instinctually.

Finally, the three skills of concentration, sensory clarity, and, once again, equanimity, are very effective tools for mindfulness, both the formal practice as mediation, and the state of being in everyday interactions.

The next enlightenment I had in this class was about enlightenment itself. I am an impatient person who tends to need resolutions or endings. If I start a task, I want to know when and how it will be completed. That being the case, I had heretofore considered enlightenment something to achieve with finality. I realize this is a consequence of the capitalist, white supremacist culture in which I was raised. I also realize, more and more, that life is always in process. I learned in this class that, enlightenment too, is not an end unto itself. There are stages, including stream entry (sotapanna), once returner (Sakadagami), non returner, and Nirvana (Anagami). I still don’t fully comprehend the meaning of each of these but I am encouraged to learn more. My real take-away from our conversations on enlightenment was that I can, and probably already have achieved enlightenment to an extent. I can also continue to reach it as I practice mindfulness. This awareness makes the struggle to cultivate a regular mindfulness practice somewhat easier, knowing there are goalposts along the way and it’s not just one long effort to achieve some elusive and likely unattainable result.

I was also enlightened by comments from my fellow students. One comment in particular was especially challenging for me. A student expressed a reluctance to practice mediation with us, which was something I had never encountered before. This person’s reluctance stemmed from the idea of misappropriation of a tradition not their own and disrespect of objects considered “holy.”

I empathize with the hesitation associated with disparaging the holy. However, I have meditated and practiced in a number of Buddhist traditions and, although there were many “holy” objects, mainly on altars, I never experienced sensitivity to others not treating anything as holy, which they, themselves, did not consider holy.

I respect the caution about misappropriation as well. However, from my experience, I don’t know that there is that same sensitivity in Buddhist practices other than Nichiren Buddhism practiced by Sokkagakai. I believe it was the student’s experience with Sokkagakai that led them to this sensitivity. Personally, my own experience with Sokkagakai has not aligned with my overall experience with Buddhism, so it does not surprise me. I’ve sat with many Buddhist practitioners and, outside of Sokkagakai, never experienced sensitivity or protectiveness with regards to misappropriation.

In fact, I asked a teacher once. “What if I don’t believe in karma, or nirvana or have the same respect for the objects on the altar?” And they said, it doesn’t matter, as long as you follow the practice. Dharma talks I attended were always more about following the philosophy than requiring a connection to anything as “holy,” which is a word I don’t think I ever heard during these talks. There was a relaxed attitude, that anyone and everyone can practice Buddhism; that nobody is offended by someone trying to meditate, but rather very encouraging, no matter what you believe. Wherever I practiced, the leaders were quite open and excited to share knowledge and encourage people who wished to practice on their own or within their own communities.

That being said, I can absolutely see where the caution is to be sensitive to other practices and I appreciate that. I have described my experience and I don’t offer it to invalidate anyone else’s. I learned that, even with something like Buddhism, which I am comfortable practicing even as an amateur, I have to be ever mindful of sensitivity within the congregational and wider communities.

Probably the most eye-opening thing I was confronted with in this class was the connection between Buddhism and liberation theology explained by Lama Rod Owens and Angel Kyodo Williams. Liberation theology is very much connected to a person’s sense of self and their search for complex subjectivity, in the words of Dr. Anthony Pinn. So, the jump from that to the Buddhist concept of non-self is not readily apparent.

However, liberation theology involves so much more. Lama Rod Owens and Angel Kyodo Williams talked about having an intimacy with emotional pain. This includes, among other things, broken heartedness and violence that is not physical. In fact, whiteness itself, according to Lama Rod, is inherently an act of violence against black and brown people. In Buddhism, the act of relocating awareness, as the mediation teacher Loch Kelly calls it, allows one to see what they identify as self, from an outside perspective.

What we define as self, the emotions and thoughts that swirl around in our heads outside of our control, is often also described in Buddhism as the storm of the mind. Whereas the real self is outside of that storm in the open blue sky, it is ultimately unaffected by storms coming and going.

From such a perspective, we can become curious about emotional states, judgements about them, and reactions to them. For example, white people can start to truly see whiteness as an act of violence by removing the personal offense and white fragility associated with that determination. We can also comprehend our own brokenness as well as harmful emotional states that we both endure and inflict.

Lama Rod Owens put it so succinctly when he said, “anger is full of data,” and asked “what can I learn from it?” All of our emotional states are chock full of data that can instruct us. When viewed objectively as Buddhism guides us to, valuable analysis can begin.

In our discussion about black Buddhist teachers, the term fluidity also came up. This is another Buddhist concept that was introduced to me formally in this class. Fluidity refers to the coming and going of emotional states. As much as we can or cannot step out of our emotions and thoughts, they are there. They arise and dissipate beyond our control. Understanding and accepting emotional fluidity in ourselves and others, leaves space for feeling and enables the work of empathy and, subsequently, liberation.

Owens and Williams summed this up eloquently. They said that we are trapped, and others are also trapped. They explained that we are actively and uncomfortably unknowing ourselves. We must allow what we know to keep coming undone. They talk about love as space, the space to allow fluidity. In other words, fluidity is holding space to allow everyone to be as they are.

The final learning from this class that I’d like to talk about before I describe how I will use Buddhism in my ministry, is about mediation itself. We don’t stand outside of our awareness by just understanding that we must. It is through the regular practice of mediation that we develop the capacity to notice things like anger, objectively.

I already mentioned the three concrete skills I learned that mindfulness meditation teaches us: concentration, sensory clarity and, equanimity, or accepting what your experience is in the moment. During class we actively practiced various mediation techniques as well. Shamatha, for example, is meditation that helps develop concentration power. Vipassana is another technique that is meant to help the partitioner find insight. One of the practices associated with Vipassana, but also a separate practice in its own right, is the Indo-Tibetan practice of Dgzochen. I really connected with this practice which, as I understand it, is the idea of experiencing true existence or true identity in a very visceral way.

As I read more about this practice, I realized it is a complex practice with a long history and there are quite a significant number of iterations. After experiencing small samples of it in class with substantially positive results, I was excited to begin a more in-depth exploration of Dgzochen for myself and those to whom I minister.

As with my realization about enlightenment being truly achievable, I was also very encouraging to learn that we already have all the mindfulness we need. Through a regular meditation practice, we can tap into that pre-existing mindfulness.

I considered various ways to integrate my new learnings about Buddhist practice and ideas into my future ministry as well as the larger practice of Unitarian Universalism.

There are some obvious ways including centering in the moment, which is necessary to start meetings and group gatherings. When we come together in community, we bring with us our anxieties and stresses. Leaving our worries at the door as the saying goes, is an essential prerequisite to getting down to the business of spirituality. Buddhist practices can certainly help to facilitate this. In the long term, teaching meditation can aid significantly in making the community more beloved, as we increase our ability to empathize and rest in equanimity.

I also believe worship can be modeled on Buddhist meditative practice when the times call for it. For instance, I created a worship that mirrored Buddhist mindfulness techniques right before the recent election in order to bring people into the moment in a way that was relaxing and calming.

What I’ve talked about so far are broad ways to incorporate Buddhist ideas into Unitarian Universalist practice and ministry. In thinking about Buddhism in the context of the larger Unitarian Universalist world and ministry over time, I have considered two specific ideas.

For a long time now, I have considered how to incorporate modern abolition work into my ministerial call. I want to do ministry within the prison industrial complex. One thing I feel is necessary, is pastoral care in the form of small group gatherings incorporating compassion education. Since the tension level within penitentiaries is incredibly high, a mediation class or dharma talk would be very conducive to releasing tension and opening up space for all manner of healing, mental and physical. Most work of this type done in prisons is with the inmates. I believe in order to truly reform the system in necessary ways, compassion education should be offered to guards and administration as well.

I did some research, and it turns out there are a number of available resources. One of the primary resources is the Prison Mindfulness Institute, which offers education in leading mediation specifically within the prison system. Not only would this be beneficial to my future ministry but, given the current mandate for liberation work outlined in the report from The Commission on Institutional change, it might be a consideration for the UUA to look into partnering with this organization on a larger scale.

As we move into a more virtual congregational life, there are incredible opportunities to expand ministry geographically in other ways never before imagined. Right now, Unitarian Universalism does not extend consequentially into various parts of the country dominated by a more fundamentalist evangelical Christianity and conservatism which don’t align well with our progressive faith. Given the extremely bifurcated nature of our society, it is increasingly more critical to bring people together for the sake of peaceful coexistence. Certainly, introducing Unitarian Universalism with its unapologetically progressive posture, directly into the strongholds of conservative Christianity, is more than a hard sell. Healing the gaping wounds in this country is a much more delicate operation that warrants slow steps and patience. Nevertheless, it is work that must be done.

I believe that Buddhist practice would be a great ingress, a perfect means which Unitarian Universalists can begin to approach previously unapproachable communities of people. Some sort of entrepreneurial online ministry might make its mission to approach and engage people across the country with the offer to teach mindfulness. In so doing, a relationship can be built, and the groundwork laid for a new manner of beloved community.

If people are curious about Unitarian Universalism, and want to learn about, or participate in UU worship, they would be welcomed. However, given our principles reject missionary work and direct us to respect meaning-making in all forms, I’m not suggesting a goal of “conversion” to Unitarian Universalism. I am suggesting that lines of communication can be opened and working relationships can be developed vis-à-vis a loving connection facilitated by a secularized Buddhist practice that might appeal to both sides without challenging firmly entrenched beliefs and systems.

In summation, this class re-invigorated my love for Buddhism, fortified the knowledge I already had, introduced me to new concepts and ideas, and motivated me to learn more and work to incorporate Buddhism into my personal ministry with specific goals.